David Conneely – Sight

SIGHT

By David Conneely

I never really fit in, I was a broken branch grafted on to a different family tree. Adopted, because my real parents didn’t understand me. They could never see past my one seemingly defining feature. I see things that aren’t there, and because of this they couldn’t truly see me. And that’s the thing, I’m not the person who sees people that aren’t there, I’m simply a person who sometimes has hallucinations.

I guess it could be hard to understand me though, I could be having what seemed like a normal day, and then the world around me would seemingly start to dissolve. There would be terribly bright flashes of white light and I would be standing, not in my classroom or my bedroom, but in a world where the sun seemed to be much to close to the face of the planet. It beat down showing no mercy. Everything was blindingly bright and brilliant, but falsely so, the leaves far too green, the sun too yellow. There were people there too, horribly deformed I might add. Their faces seemed to be made of wax that had started to melt and was slowly dripping down their cheeks. Sometimes it would all seem far too realistic to be a hallucination and I would start to panic. I always tried to keep though, because once I started panicking, I could be overcome by the gruelling heat and would sometimes find myself passed out on the sand, breathing heavily, with a few of the “people” crowded around shouting things like “Are you ok?” or “What’s wrong?”, their voices shrill and worried.

These creatures may seem kind, but I’ll never trust them, sometimes….. No, I don’t want to talk about that, too many memories I need to forget.

Soon I would wake to find myself either lying on the floor or propped up on a chair. Everyday I try to live a normal life, but in all honesty, I’m barely living, just existing, watching the world go by outside my window, waiting for the day the hallucinations will go away once and for all…

But no, this isn’t the story I have to tell, because I took control of my life and researched day and night trying to find the source of my problem. Along this journey I met many people like me, strong, brave individuals who didn’t let their hallucinations define them. I decided I wouldn’t either. I found out that the hallucinations were brought on by bright flashing lights, and considering I lived in New York, it wasn’t surprising they were so frequent. Eventually I moved to a small town called Camden. In no way is my life perfect, far from it, but my hallucinations are few and far between now, and for once I’m happy, for once I’m looking forward instead of back

I’ve learned that it’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see…

And I see light at the end of this tunnel.

David Conneely.
6th Class St. Patrick’s BNS,
Lombard Street,
Galway

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